(Sung to the tune of The Ballad of Jed Clampett)
Come 'n listen to a story 'bout a ma'am named Joe A poor soldier boy, who's gender is unknown. And then one day, he was feelin' Patton blue When 'round the corner came a man with big boobs Corporal Klinger that is, in a pretty dress, lookin' fine! Well, the next thing you know, old Joe's a section 8 Military folk said, Joe, get on out of here! Said, Californy is the place for all you nuts So he packed up all his stuff and he moved to Frisco San Fran that is, out of the closet, in pretty dresses! Well, now it's time to say goodbye to Joe and all his glam He'd like to thank you folks for electin' Clinton in You're all invited to touch, his satin dress for free But don't even thing about rejoinin' the army Re-enlistin', that is, "Don't ask, don't tell" Y'all keep his secret, ya' hear?